Sinful Sunday: Loving two people

Bi ThreesomeIs it ever possible to love two people, equally, without one becoming a favorite? In some cultures men are able to take more than one wife. In interviews, they will often claim that they love all their wives equally.

Do you buy this? Are they fooling themselves, or just their wives?

Or can a man love in a way that women cannot?

Would it be possible for a bisexual man to love a man and woman equally?

Men and women are so different, is it possible to love them in the same way? Or is it a case, if you can’t love them in the same way you do love them differently, and therefore not equally?

How would you feel about, if you learnt that your partner loved another person, and you? Could you accept it? Do you believe it is possible? Would your concept of ‘love’ demand exclusivity? Would you feel cheated, betrayed? Would you fight to win them back exclusively?

Tell me what you think.

These are some of the ideas that will be explored in my up coming novel Kpasa. A love bisexual triangle.

 

Look out for it this winter.

In the meantime why not read one of my short taster novels.

Femme Fatale: Slave to My Nature Series eBook: Robert India: BUY FROM KINDLE STORE 

Femme Fatale

Svetlana in Heels: A short story about the power of beautiful feet eBook: Robert India: BUY FROM KINDLE STORE

Svetlana in Heels

14 thoughts on “Sinful Sunday: Loving two people

  1. I can definitely imagine loving two people at the same time, equally and differently. The person who has that is doubly blessed.

      1. Some people never know real love. If you have that and consider it a torment, then you don’t recognize how precious it is.

  2. Literally equal or figuratively so? I’d say it’s not possible because people are different and you see and respond to them differently. You love them – of that there is no doubt but when you get to the fine details, you find that you love them differently. Then you factor in the way someone wants to be loved… which might not be exactly how they are loved.

  3. i don’t know about men, but i, as a woman, definitely believe i can love more than one man at a time. Having said that, i’ve never been with more than one at a time, physically, (not that i don’t want…hubby isn’t into that) but i have relationships with a couple other men online, each of whom i love. Perhaps that love is different, but i’ve developed very tender feelings for each of them over the two years we’ve “known” each other. Not sure the love is equal,though, because i’ve been with my husband for over 41 years.

      1. You find a way to understand and realize that loving is more important than being jealous – not an easy thing to do. People have insecurities, even those people who believe they have none. Love, however, is powerful and can create insecurities and jealousy where it never existed before and much more so if it appears that one person is being loved more (or better) than the other.

        It is both a blessing and a torment and one must learn to set aside the negative emotions that will bombard them at some point. They can’t ignore those feelings – they’re human – but they have to see that the negative feelings cannot be allowed to interfere with love and all its joys.

        It’s not easy. I’ve been in that situation where I loved three women who loved me and while I felt that I was disciplined enough to control my negative thoughts and feelings, it wasn’t always so with them. In a way, it’s not that one has negative feelings in this – it’s how they’re dealt with… and if that love is to survive and grow, they must be dealt with.

        Failure to do this will ultimately doom the relationship.

        The good thing about writing a story around this is that, as the author, you can put your characters into this mess (and it is a mess) and then figure out a way to get them out of it cleanly (and believably) – that’s gonna be fun. Or maybe you don’t let them off the hook and, as in real life, they all crash and burn.

  4. I’m not so sure it’s possible. I think even if you are in love two people at the same time, there is always a favourite, even if they don’t want to admit it. Romantic love is not the same as the love a parent has for their children, for example, where you love each of them equally and unconditionally, without question. But then again, what would I know…I’ve always been monogamous.

  5. Oh Robert, where to begin.*sigh*. The comment ” can a man love in a way that women cannot?” NO! But that is besides the point. LOL

    I am one of those odd people that don’t tend to have favorite things. I hate being asked what is your favorite…… Movie, song, band, food, color, flower…. My friends will tell that I do not have favorites. I love variety, could never pic just one. (Not to say I can not commit and be truly faithful to one person).

    So I can relate to the idea of different, but equal. Equal in AMOUNT of love, not TYPE of love.

    I think that people’s emotional needs need be met to not have jealousy. If you are not getting what you need, a third party will always feel like they are getting “your share”. Time your love has with them is time they don’t have for you.

    It is possible, but I do think it is always a challenge.

    1. I would totally agree, you can equal but not the same. But many people equate difference with value. Because two things are not the same, they must have differing values. We live in a hierarchal world, and that has polluted our idea of love.

      1. True. So many other issues too. Told that plural love is disrespectful and degrading. “You are not enough”.

        Also it is very hard to always make someone feel loved and appreciated and meet their emotional needs. Once needs aren’t met, jealousy is bound to set in. For one person to feel they are getting emotional table scraps.

        I admire people who can do it and keep a healthy happy relationship. Have friends that have done it and are much stronger and happier for it.

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