I must be a fool as I never see it coming, although Houseguest always does. Maybe it’s because it creeps up on me? Before I even realise it, I’m overcome by it. Yet, my beloved Houseguest has it set in her calendar, and can set a clock by it. The symptoms are always the same, irritability, restlessness, increasingly rough passionate sex.
It’s more than she can endure, and so she had been avoiding me all week. I can appreciate that I’m utterly insufferable when I’m in a Sex Rage, like an excitable, leg humping puppy but what can I do? I am but a man.
There is only one treatment for my Sex Rage (Dimorphic Sex Iram Gestu syndrome). Full on filthy, rough, depraved sex. You have to beat it out of me! So my monthly treatment began yesterday with MFM Threesome Therapy. Our third leg had clear instructions from Houseguest: Pound him like a Christian Brother: without pity or mercy.
So there I am, on my back, with eight inches of hard Irish meat in me, taking my medicine, when Houseguest asks if me if I am feeling any better? First of all, it’s hard to answer when you are eating pussy, and secondly she should know by now that a mere threesome is insufficient to treat my illness.
Low and behold, I wore them out.
My Sex Rage is still symptomatic and I am as irritable as ever. So a further course of treatment has been laid on: a full bisexual foursome.
Pray for me, I’m a very sick man!
What course of treatment would you recommend?
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